The Idea: We’ve all heard about the Kardashians doing it, and we can only assume that the Victoria Secret models aren’t born a different hairless species that the rest of us common folk, but until my very best friend and beauty confidant, and fellow HG (hairy girl) began looking into laser, I had never considered it an option. I’ve tried just about every hair removal method on the planet- I’ve plucked, shaved, sugared and waxed. And yet nothing could stop those pesky hairs and ingrowns from resurfacing and thus giving me a permanent 5 o’clock body shadow. Enter: New You Laser. After searching countless deals and promotions, I found what appeared to be the cheapest laser salon in Manhattan that still used the coveted Alexandra Lite Machine- the crème de la crème of LHR machines, one that promises the most impact per session meaning less treatments. I am not wealthy by any standard, and after laughing in my dermatologists face about the price of laser treatment in her office, I was shocked at the very reasonable price tag New You offered: A package of five body parts (I did brazillian, underarm, lower leg, lower arm and belly line), six sessions, two payments, and a grand total of $500. It looks like a big number at first, but if you’ve ever bought a wax package at European Wax Center, then you can appreciate how much you are actually saving.
The Experience: I went into the salon for a consultation and was completely unimpressed with the office. It was drab, small, and to make matters worse, in MIDTOWN. But I kept reminding myself of the end goal. They did a small test patch on my underarm and promised me that after six sessions I was sure to be “a smooth baby dolphin”. Well, I went through all six sessions and have come out a better, smoother, even babier dolphin than I ever could have imagined. Below are some pointers, tips, and FAQ’s:
- “Does it hurt?” is the question I am most frequently asked. And the answer is no, not exactly. It’s very tolerable. It’s uncomfortable for sure, and certain areas (hellooo, down there) were definitely more uncomfortable than others. But I have two tattoos, and I’d say it hurts less than those. In the end, just think about it this way: six thirty-minute sessions of slight pain for a lifetime of never cutting yourself with a razor again. Now that hurts.
- “Okay, so what does it feel like?” It feels like a laser! Never felt one of those, huh? You feel a very very slight pinch followed by a burst of cool air that the machine spits out to make the pain go away. The best part? It doesn’t last at all. Zero stinging feeling afterwards.
- Make sure to shave the night before! I made the mistake of shaving the day of, and it makes the pain worse.
- You will have to stay out of the sun for the entire time you are undergoing LHR. That means 36 weeks (6 sessions, once every 6 weeks). So try to do it in the winter if you can.
- The hair will naturally fall out on its own after each session. Try not to pick. It’s very tempting.
- No two sessions will feel alike, as they boost the setting each time you go.
All in all, this was an experience that I would undergo every six weeks for the rest of my life to maintain my smooth underwater mammal skin.